Monday, December 17, 2018

Strangle Hold


 Dear darling Santa,

A year has passed since Christmas 2017. A long arid summer, followed by its opposite, a drenching autumn, and now winter, fast approaching.

As the 2017 photo above attests, my encounter with you (my best pal and buddy) was a tad fraught. It's a photo only a Mama could love.

Still, bye-gones shall be bye-gones and I have my Christmas list ready for your final approval (and action).

Mercury's List of Preferred Toys, Treats, and Gifts 


Red Plaid Flannel Dog Hoodie

A SPOT plush bone with face toy

A SPOT soccer ball

A "Charming Pet" Christmas puzzler dog toy

Greenies teeny treats (the largest bag)

**A new XS iphone of my very own would also be welcome, indeed

Please note, I've been extremely well-behaved this year despite significant health problems. Multiple doctor visits, x-rays, ultra-sound, a trip to the emergency room and a surgery that resulted in scores of stitches. I wore the cone of shame (otherwise known as an Elizabethan Collar) proudly.

I've become ever more attentive to Mama as we've continued to bond over our shared interest in film and Brit TV. As I've learned from a book I've been reading recently, dogs and humans share a "deep interest in friendship, cooperation, and justice." We share much in common but our differences may be what cements the 40,000+ years of living in love, peace, and solidarity. [see Willing Dogs & Reluctant Masters: on friendship and dogs by Gary Borjesson] 

With Papa and grand-père, I've worked diligently to alleviate the many burdens on Mama so that she may spend happy hours watching, reading, and thinking, i.e. her retirement goals.

Finally,  dearest Santa, I wish you all the best this holiday season. Please enjoy your final week of rest and relaxation before your strenuous Christmas Eve travel around the world to visit all the good little girls and boys.

As a (thoughtful) token of my esteem, this year I shall hold the milk and instead leave French cognac and a large-sized chocolate bar (Mrs. Sees) to warm you on your way.

With undying affection and love, your very best friend in the whole wide world,

Mercury Murphy Roushanzamir


PS: I finally got my driver's license. Maybe I share driving responsibilities with you in 2019? I think you could leave more gifts for each child at each visit if you had my assistance.