My Christmas Letter 2010

Dear Darling Santa,

I hope this finds you as it leaves me: very well behaved indeed.

Yes, I've been ever so good this year. I don't shiver when I have to go to Doggie Styles. I brush my teeth daily. I never sneak into the bathroom where the toilet paper roll is left unattended (well, hardly ever). I don't beg for food (honesty compels me to add that Papa keeps me well fed, no need to beg). I bark at bad guys & I allow little children to pet me. I haven't pouted or cried. I've been a good helper all year long. For example, I guarded the next door neighbors' house when they were out of town. I taught Mama how to use her new favorite computer gadget, Dropbox. I picked up after myself. I behaved unselfishly -- as proof see the lists below for Maman et Papa; these I made up myself which shows that I take others into consideration & have empathy for their needs and desires.

All that being said, and as you can see from the photo above, I am looking for you every day and hoping that I'll see you soon. I will leave out some milk & cookies, the milk laced with brandy for it is now quite cold in Athens and your open sleigh isn't the best vehicle for winter traveling.

Here is my list:

my own TV set with remote control & wifi connection

new microfiber suede bed for my home (preferably red)

high IQ interactive puzzle doggie toys and

a Dog Dizzy interactive toy

an India rubber ball (also preferably, red)

an argyle sweater (pinks & browns)

a personalized small toy bucket

Papa's list:

a vintage Alpha Romeo (preferably champagne color)

non-stick skillet

2 or 3 good books

Gap jeans

Ray-Ban prescription sun glasses

Maman's list:

a 10-carat diamond ring set in platinum

Chanel perfume (the large size)

Shopping spree at Burberry's in London

jar of caviar (the large size)

Dear, darling Santa. I love you so much. You are my very best friend. Please bring all these items to our house on Christmas Eve!

Lots of love, your good friend Mercury Murphy Roushanzamir

PS: Here is a present for you, Dear Santa. It is an enhanced photo that I created all by myself. If you like, you can take it with you on your flight around the world on Christmas Eve. It'll be good company for you. Love, again Mercury

Photo Manipulation & a day at the beauty salon

This Monday was my scheduled visit to Doggie Styles where Kelly reigns supreme as Master Stylist. The first to arrive was a very old, almost bald, creaky white poodle. She had to be in a special wheel chair, only lifted out for very careful grooming.

The real truth is that I dislike visiting Doggie Styles. Not because Kelly isn't a Great Groomer--she is! Not because the decor is rather shabby chic--it is, but coming from my household who am I to complain. But for some reason, once I even get wind of the visit--usually the evening before since Maman et Papa start behaving in a guilty manner--I begin to shiver uncontrollably. I do sleep through the night, but morning always brings that dread knowledge.

Luckily once there I have my own spot picked out; it's very close to the door, the Way Out. When Kelly walks by I scoot back and try to make myself as small as possible. However, there has never been a visit during which Kelly didn't hunt me down and lift me up to the Table. There, tethered and alone, with all eyes on me, I'm shorn, primped, cleaned and last but not least, the manicure.

My question for Kelly: how could you have entered this dark profession. The strange contradiction is that Maman et Papa fervently hope that Kelly will have a long, distinguished career as a dog groomer and that she will not be lured away by some Big City salon in New York, London or Paris.

Special Photography Effects

My current creative project is represented by this photo. Using a variety of filters and functions, I create special effects such as the tones of old cameras and films such as Lomo and Agfa and Ilford. A variegated effect function creates the simulacrum of age and dirt. Color photos can be transformed into Sepia and black & white. Here you have my first effort. The picture was shot by Maman; I manipulated the image.

Are any of you, my faithful friends and fans, interested in photography? The art form, originally seen as in opposition to high art, then became identified with high culture, both art and industrial. Now, especially with the advent of smart phones, anyone can be a photographic artist, everyone if free to express and explore the individuality and, through social media, their connections to others as well.

Don't you agree: we live in terrible and wonderful times?

Photography & Multi-media

As promised, the medium I've selected for my first creative endeavor: photography with a kind of collage of special effects.

In photo one, I've re-engineered this picture of Maman to evoke a variety of mental images: possessed borg, oil slick on city street, Soylent Green.

Photo 2 [below] highlights the changing focus over human history from body to mind, but without judgment as to whether this is a positive or negative trend. It also suggests travel through time and space, posing the question: is such travel actual or is it a mental/chemical process? Notice the rays that extend from head and lips, from front & back and perhaps especially from the eye. Are those eyes, the physical Eye, the mind's eye, perhaps a metaphorical I?

I hope you enjoy this first evidence of my talents as a photographer and multi-media artist. Check back soon for other efforts. And feel free to share your reactions, interpretations or even your own art work by clicking the comments link.

Hiatus

As all my actor friends know, we describe our time between gigs as resting. And resting is what I've been doing since my last blog entry.

Attribute it to the hot & humid weather, the absence of 30,000+ college students, or merely a general malaise, I've not felt the energy nor the desire to update my blog.

But as the fall weather blew into Athens (and all those students rematerialized turning my street into a parking lot once more), I realized how terribly selfish I've been.

To you, my faithful fans & friends, I offer a humble apology. I'm sorry that I've let you down. To my grandparents, who are probably my least critical readers, a special word of thanks for your patience.

This fall I shall be exploring the world of creative arts, mine and others. Look for my first project, coming soon: a collage the subject of which is humans in a dog's world. My 2nd project, also in the works, dovetails nicely with the collage since it explores the same topic through the genre of poetry.

I hope this long hiatus will not deter you from checking back from time to time. I promise to share my newly rediscovered creative productivity throughout the fall season & culminating with my very favorite holiday. Christmas! When once again Santa will read my letter & grace my home with his presence. And presents.

I am a Miniature!

Self reflection has the potential for positive and negative outcomes. On the one hand, self reflection leads to personal and spiritual growth. But it can also enmesh one in a tangled web of doubt and even despair.

My own contemplation has led to a surprising result: physical growth.

Yes, I exaggerate. However, I've discovered that far from the toy poodle tag with which I was branded by the American Kennel Association and contrary to my lineage which runs to the toy category, I am a Miniature!

Physical size tends to be the qualifier forthe toy, miniature and standard poodle descriptor. My first suspicions were aroused when I learned that my breeder told Maman et Papa that my top weight was expected to be 8.5 pounds. Patently ridiculous for I am now at a comfortable 12. I searched the AKC official poodle book for qualifying measurements and rechecked the information on the AKC web site . Honesty compels me to note that according to the measurements taken at my doctor's office, I seem to be on the toy-miniature cusp. At first this seemed an insurmountable barrier to true self knowledge.

Further contemplation suggested that proper assessment comprises qualitative as well as quantitative values. Among the qualitative values: strength, self-possession, tough demeanor with a heart of gold, a light and springy gait, willingness to help the little chap and challenge the oppressor, large intellect and a sizable girth, etc.

As most of you already know, I possess all these qualities in abundance.

In the end, self reflection was a highly positive experience leading from restricted self knowledge through an identity crisis to a fully realized sense of the true me.

Now no longer under the false impression that I'm a toy poodle, I proclaim my newly acquired knowledge to the multitudes (and to my faithful fans & friends): I am a Miniature!

Note: Strangely & despite what I regard as the fruits of my self reflection, Papa still thinks I'm a toy poodle with the bark of a standard, and Grandpere advises that I wear a Western hat rather than a pink polka-dotted one.

Many Happy Returns of the Day

Today is my 5th birthday. According to my birth certificate, which lists my parents, grandparents, etc. back to the fourth generation, I am the last in a long, prestigious line of red & apricot toy poodles.

However, documents may be forged, no? Mama informs me that I'm too tall and too portly to be considered a toy poodle. So, from this day forward, just call me Miniature Mercury Murphy Roushanzamir.

Surely each birthday evokes a certain amount of self examination along with concerns about identity: toy/miniature, nurture/nature, culture of origin/adopted culture, and so on.

But equally if not more importantly, birthdays bring Gifts & Presents. I love gifts & presents. And I appreciate them, each and every one. Presents should be wrapped in tissue paper, preferably tied up with a pretty ribbon. I love gift wrapping and I appreciate each gift and present wrapping (and unwrapping). It is so sweet that my friends and fans, my Maman et Papa, grandmere et granpere are thinking of me on my birthday; and should you need just a bit of assistance in the gifts & presents department, read on.

My birthday list:

Handmade doggie IQ-test toy (real wood)

Doggie Casino Brainy Board Game

ARFgyle Dog sweater (for celebration when the hideous heat & humidity ends)

Eco dog personalized place mat

Dream Dog toy

Meteorite LED ball dog toy

May your day on this, my birthday, be as happy as mine is and continues to be. Cheers from your friend on my special day with many happy returns of this day for us all.

Tender is the Night

Meet my close personal friend, Sophie, who recently joined her jet-set friend on the Cote d'Azur where she is attending and reporting on the Cannes Film Festival.

If you click on her name in the previous paragraph, you'll be directed to her Chicago Sun-Times blog which she keys at the request of noted film critic Roger Ebert [read his own Cannes journal].

Of course, the Riviera is a particularly lovely part of my native France, about which people simply gush, "Location, Location, Location." Human beings are spell bound by the colors, the climate, the beaches, the water, the "picturesque natives," and the glitterati. The Riviera forms the background of many famous films--To Catch a Thief--and novels--Tender is the Night. Even George Simenon could not resist sending his hero, the incomparable Maigret, to noodle out the cause of death of a former French resistance worker in Maigret on the Rivera.

Ah, the Cote d'Azur nights, balmy, gently breezy, the frequent sightings of both the quirkily dramatic and the utterly simple haute couture, dazzling diamonds and moonlight, the food, wine, the tender trembling moments when life seems to hang in balance between the earthly and the sublime-- but perhaps these are subjects for my own future blogs.

Dear friends and fans, I hope you will check Sophie's blog regularly. She is an excellent writer, a keen observer, and a practiced participant at the Cannes film festival with a broad and deep knowledge of films both classic and contemporary. Equally important, she is a young woman for whom I have a deep affection, respect, and admiration. Indeed, I love her very much.

Although she asked me to accompany her on this great adventure, I was unable to comply. For much as I miss my international and Hollywood film friends and know that my presence would be of great service to Sophie, Maman and Papa need me more. Without me, their simple Athens lives would doubtless fall into chaos and that is something that duty no less than affection will not permit. So I must be satisfied with these Chicago Sun-Times images of the Cote d'Azur and my darling Sophie, and the "Sophie Kohn from Cannes blog." Read her first entry, A Market Badge of One's Own [such a clever title], now and return frequently for updates [to her blog & to mine!].

Lullaby and Good Night

Bed time is always a special time. Although not for the reasons you may think. The first challenge is to avoid PJs, a trick performed only through practice and repetition. Here, for example, you see one of my failures.

On the bright side, I watch pre-bed time television. And stay up for as late as Maman et Papa will allow. The trick with television is to commandeer the remote. This photo shows a successful attempt. From there on it's clear sailing (so to speak). I choose the channel, I choose the shows. Saturday night's English comedy night; my favorite, Keeping Up Appearances. Law & Order is on some channel on almost every night. As for "reality television" I choose What Not to Wear and Millionaire Matchmaker.

All good things must end (again, so to speak). Eventually Maman et Papa insist on putting me to bed. They expect me to cuddle & lick, they croon and talk baby talk, and finally through sheer exasperation if nothing else I fall asleep.

Of course I don't know what I'm missing, but I'm convinced wild and wonderful things occur.

Little Lucy Visits

As you'll note from the photo, I've been napping and catching up with my zzzzz's after a thrilling spring break weekend. Little Lucy, aka Lucy Robins, flew into town from Boston, accompanied by Melinda, her Maman. [see other photo]

I've known Lucy long-distance for several years but this was our first face-to-face. Maman has known Melinda for a couple of decades! Maman et Papa love Melinda and Lucy. Perfect set up for a wonderful few doggie-centered days.

What we did: ate. watched the Oscar's. walked. slept. played. ran & jumped in the UGA intramural fields. requested special treats. Need I say more? Every element of a perfect fun-filled weekend.

What I learned about Lucy: her weight, 9lbs. personality, alpha dog. talents, goes for a walk off leash. Adventuresome & adapts well to unfamiliar & challenging situations. Willing to travel tourist class even though she's a first-class kind of girl.

Lucy revealed a lot about her life in Melrose (the town near Boston where Lucy's house is located). She occasionally travels into the city to give a lecture at Emerson College after which she lunches at the Ritz and then indulges in a postprandial stroll through the Boston Gardens. On days at home, she rests, roots out dropped bits of food, gazes out the windows, dips into a murder mystery (she prefers those by Georges Simenon or the English police procedural genre) and then rests when her eyes get tired from reading. She asserts her alpha personality when necessary -- which is infrequent since she established her requirements on her initial interview with Melinda. Few variations to those established routines of home life occur.

Lucy enjoys long walks, rainy days spent indoors, prefers Italian to Mexican foods, and swing to punk. Favorite film star: Asta. Favorite color: red (like her coat). She enjoys a cuddle but she also treasures alone time.

I love Lucy now that I've met her face-to-face even more than I loved her long-distance. She's my best pal. I'm so happy that she accepted my gift to her, the royal-purple bed that becomes her so well.

Hope

Dear Friends & Fans,

This is a meditation on Hope. I celebrate the quality of Hope which passes by all depression, sadness, dire circumstances and bad behavior.

Hope leads me to expect many meals and more desserts each day. Perhaps I'm not altogether worthy; I certainly get more than my share. But, beautifully prepared and served is the food that I enjoy each day.

Hope springs eternal (or very close to it) that Maman will not force or even encourage me to wear doggie clothes. Doggie clothes are not really for doggies nor are they really clothing -- they gape in embarrassing places.

Each month I hope that I won't have to go to Doggie Shapes. For as much as I like Kelly's company, unspeakable things happen at Doggie Shapes. Enough said.

Hope is the light that lets me imagine that I will spend all the days of my life with Maman et Papa and that each day to come will be as joyful as those already lived.

My wish for you is that Hope also lights your life and shows you the way through any darkness you may encounter.

Love, Mercury Murphy Roushanzamir

On a winning streak

Reuters photo staff [Shannon Stapleton/Reuters] can be credited with capturing this winsome endearing picture of Sadie, the Westminster Best in Show winner 2010. But where was Reuters when I struck the poses and performed the stunts that remain alas known only to a lucky few? Where was Reuters when, newly bathed and coiffed I returned home, bow on collar and smelling of a subtle combination of lavender and rose?

I admit I only browsed the entire online showing of Westminster which in any case was televised over a couple of days. I had other, more pressing shows to watch. Primarily, Law & Order; my good friend, now, sadly, deceased, Jerry Orbach, plays his role of roles Lenny Briscoe. Lenny Briscoe is a fully developed character that Orbach wore like a skin. A working class man with a Catholic-Jewish childhood. A recovering alcoholic with a past littered with damaged relationships and long-borne hurts. A good cop. A good friend. A tender human being. A 20th century man. Yes, Law & Order by and large trumped the Westminster.

The poodle showing in the "Toy" category disgraced himself. No, that's not quite correct. Human beings seem determined to impose specific cuts and shapes to our naturally luxuriant hair in order to conform to their own odd whims. Yes, the dog had teased locks in front and shaved hair (none) on the rear. This look is not modern; poodles are mocked for it. But remember, poodles were long exploited as hunters and retrievers of water fowl. During those days, now consigned to a tiny historical footnote, the cut was required by the demands of the job. The 21st century makes no such demands on poodles; the Westminster--and the AKC to whom it owes allegiance--should rethink these archaic demands. Poodles everywhere would rejoice.

I titled this entry "On a winning streak" and I'll end with what's been won. Visibility on prime time television for dogs everywhere. Respect for owners who choose gourmet food, provide basic necessities & plenty of treats, heightened awareness of the importance of education and entertain for their dogs. And reminders, if such were needed, of the relevance of dogs to civil society. And finally, a comfortable seat on the couch from which to watch the dog show, mounted in NYC, and Law & Order, shot in NYC, from my safe, warm home in Athens, GA.

Dear Friends & Fans & Darling Santa,

I must admit that I've made grievous errors. First and foremost, I did not write a thank you letter to Santa. What must I have been thinking of?! What disgrace have I brought down, on myself, my family, and generations to come. Even maman posted Facebook photos of the gifts I received (& had asked for) for Christmas.

But my punishment is swift and sure. Valentine's Day arrives within 2 weeks. But doggie Valentine's Day pictures appointments can be scheduled starting next Friday. Next Friday! Doubtless, the photographer will have pink and red heart fluffy necklaces or hats or back-drops. Maman has already explored the options and located a photographer's lair within a mile of our home.

To my friends and fans, but in particular to my darling Santa who granted every wish, accept my deepest apologies for the hubris and lack of loving-kindness with which I have acted, and please send messages to maman to spare me the indignities of doggie Valentine's Day portraits.